Gil Thibault
Julie Larocco
Chris AbkeStalled
Posted by Julie Larocco on November 28, 2011
Monday morning, 9:35 a.m. I am sitting in my ’97 Honda Accord, stubbornly turning the key in the ignition for the fifth time. The car springs to li— … no, it doesn’t. Once again, it fails to turn over, growling, making that er-er-er-er-er sound that comes with weather under 50 degrees.
I am stalled. The car is reasonably warm inside. My fingers are stiff, my nose is running, but it’s tolerable. I try starting it again. Er-er-er-er-er…
9:45. I call my workplace, Kansas City Rescue Mission, to tell them the obvious. I’m late to work. I open my laptop and answer emails in the car. I listen to NPR. I feel so trapped.
A coworker calls to ask if he can come get me. “No, I’m fine,” I say.
I know this will happen again and again this winter. I know my husband wants me to get a new car. I know there are people out there who want to help me and I know I need help, yet here I sit, trying to do this on my own.
It reminds of the guys who line up at the door for check-in each night. And I juxtapose them against the guys in KCRM’s Christian Community of Recovery. At some point, guys in the check-in line must think, “I’ve been doing this over and over, and it’s just not working. I oughta ask for help.” Then they do or they don’t. Some get on the recovery program; some just sit and turn the key again and again with the same results.
4 Responses to “Stalled”
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Terri-Neal Cooley Bennett said
I am reminded of one of my favorite sayings, “why put off until tomorrow what you can do today?” How often we procrastinate for all types of reasons! Maybe the biggest is that change is uncomfortable- change requires something of us- a sacrifice maybe or a new routine or an emotional or physical payment of some type.
Mark Van Baale (@markvanbaale) said
Thanks for sharing your story, Julie and then relating it to those who check-in each night to KCRM. I am very happy to know a good friend who decided enough was enough and who is in KCRM’s CCOR program turning his life around. Thanks to you and everyone there who is helping him!
Julie Larocco said
It’s been a privilege to watch the real guy come out, Mark. He’s definitely not “stalled” any longer. In fact, I just heard about what a gentleman he was on Thanksgiving Day.
Julie Larocco said
I agree, Terri. Change requires you to move. And even if you aren’t comfortable where you are, moving means thinking, adjusting, asking for help, etc.