That Kind of Guy … an After-Christmas Survival Essay by Zach Story

Thomas was kind of an idiot. He was a disciple of Jesus and during their time together watched him perform amazing miracles. He loved Jesus and obviously had faith in him or he would not have followed him like he did. But when Jesus died and rose again Thomas wasn’t with the other disciples and refused to believe their claims that he had returned until he could see and touch the nail marks and the scarred side. What kind of a guy sees Jesus bring Lazarus back from the dead with his own eyes and then doubts his friends when they tell him Jesus himself conquered death?
Unfortunately, sometimes I am that kind of guy. This past Thanksgiving part of my job was to coordinate the delivery of almost 500 single serve meals to elderly and shut ins in the community. This Christmas I worked to accumulate and organize gift distribution for our 37 residents and 125 overnight clients. I communicated back and forth between volunteers and program guys for our adoption program that had volunteers shopping for our men’s families to help them reconnect to relatives this past Christmas. And through the whole process, I often worried, stressed, and even doubted my ability to get it all done.
My whole life I’ve grown up with the idea that God helps those who help themselves. To an extent I know this is true. God is not going to pour out His blessings on someone who just sits around lazily waiting for good things to happen. But I’ve taken this concept to an extreme. I don’t usually realize it, but I often end up operating under the assumption that I’m the one who has to make things happen. As the oldest child in a family with a mostly absentee father I’ve grown used to taking on a job that needs done. The holiday tasks I mentioned above would not have been possible without the help of God, but I stubbornly viewed myself as having to do it on my own.
So more than doubting myself, I doubted that my God would come through for me, even though He always had in the past. I’ve seen God do amazing things in my 25 years. I had a brain tumor in the back of my head that was supposed to kill me or leave me brain dead for the rest of my life, and to my doctor’s confusion God took it away. So here I am, blessed by God, and yet doubting that he cares enough to come through for me in my hour of need. It was foolishness. But God loves me, and was patient with me. Thanksgiving and Christmas were both successes. God moved, and I was blessed enough to not only watch, but be used in the process of helping others.

Zach survived KCRM's Thanksgiving and Christmas festivities and is gearing up to do it again next year!

I’m writing now, because I know I’ll eventually need this reminder. I understand Thomas at a certain level, but I don’t want to be long remembered for my doubts. I want to always remember the powerful ways God moves in my life so that blind, child-like faith is the only natural response to any circumstance that comes my way.